There were many times in my own life when I had to step back and see if my life can be improved. I think that the concept to do so was embedded when I was younger in my early 20s and I was finally seeing life for what it is, sort of. I didn’t want to grow older knowing I didn’t do certain things or that I’ve had to over dedicate myself through the same certain phases of my life. After all, life is all big lessons to be learned after another. Sometimes we find ourselves growing unhappy with where we are in life and we feel stagnant, not ever thinking we can get out of the positions in life where we are.
Because of being able to accept that I can just “be like water” (a famous yoga saying), I’m able to be flexible and live in the moment just like what water teaches us. Water doesn’t control what it cannot control but just flows with where it’s taken and goes with its transformation.
Because of taking action through how I was able to change my life many times (get out of depression, travel, quit unfulfilling jobs to get the work I wanted, create and get into a community, overcome burnout, have a more positive life, and become more positive), once you learn how to get out of those ruts, it gets easier to continue to renew yourself. You can even read my personal story here of how I majorly changed my life.
If you’re yearning to change your life, no matter what you’re hoping to go after, read my 5 simple tips below on how you can drastically change your life now.
1. Ask yourself first “what do I deserve?” And “what can I do to transform my life?”
To evaluate what change you’re hoping to look for in your life, it’s always a good first step to ask yourself some important questions. Look at your environment, who you surround yourself with, how you’re spending your time, and where you’re placing your energy in. Ask yourself, “Is this _____ (fill in the blank of what you’re doing) what I deserve?” You need to assess how you feel when you think about how your life looks like in this moment. Do you feel happy? Sad? Angry? Unmotivated?
After you’ve asked yourself those things, you can then think about how you want to feel. Do you want to feel happier or more motivated? If so, I would evaluate how you can reach to those feelings of elevation by listing out 3-5 things you can do to get there such as what changes you can apply.
For an example scenario… I want to travel, but my work circumstances are not allowing me to do so. I would write down at least things of what I can do to travel and those would be: I may need to have back up plan of finding a job that’s more flexible or where I can work remotely, I may need to save to be able to go to a bucket list destination, and I may first need to talk to my bosses if I can work something out to get more time off.
2. Think about how you can enrich your life rather than what you can get out of life.
One of my close friends, Jaymie, told me once when I was having anxiety because of recently having experienced disappointments through people, “I noticed you focus a lot on your relationships [with people], which is not a bad thing, but you need to focus on you.” I know when you hear that, you may think “wait…but I have been focusing on myself?” Actually, sometimes even when we thought we were just getting focused on ourselves, we can get sidetracked on what we’re really focusing on because of circumstances we get caught up in. Adversity will do that. And after she tells me, “You should see people as an addition to your life, not make them your life.”
Those sentences were very empowering for me because I noticed I lacked to nurture myself when I had let my emotions feel so controlled by those I know. I think everyone should put themselves first if you feel like you’re not equally feeling enough because someone made you feel that way. Also, it is hard to not care for others when they’ve let you down, especially when you have an empathetic nature. However, we should never dictate from the value of ourselves just because we recognize some people cannot reciprocate the respect.
Being able to be strong for yourself and knowing you’re worthy in no matter what situation you find yourself in is a life-long process. However, I know when we see people and other things as just additions to enrich our lives, instead of the center of it, then we don’t have to feel off-balanced with our own divine natures.
We need to not focus on what we can get out of life constantly especially if those people can’t meet us where we want to be met. We don’t need to attach ourselves to people, places, and ideas, but rather we can just allow those things to be in our life because they fit with the life we deserve. It’s just kind of dangerous to build our lives around others when they might not be there for us anymore.
3. Focus on the journey to get to those changes.
If we really want to change something about our life, we need to commit ourselves to allowing change to take place. Like I said above, it’s so easy to get sidetracked on our own goals and true focus in life with the mess and noise in life. It’s so easy to fall into the same old patterns if we are longing for the change we want.
Some of the old patterns we have to let go of are our limiting beliefs, not procrastinating, getting rid of addictions, and being careful with who we surround ourselves with. Negative people who are filled with negativity are people we need to avoid if we want to make positive changes in our lives. We also want to set smart habits to stay positive.
Surely you must’ve heard the saying, “It’s not [about] the destination, but the journey.” I think one of the best things in life is that we have the agency to enjoy the journey of putting change in our lives. The reason why you don’t want to focus on the destination of a journey of change that you’re on is that you don’t want to put higher expectations on yourself when the outcome you got is not the one you were looking for. Because sometimes, God has a funny way of showing us things we weren’t aware of needing!
I like to see day-to-day what things I can do to improve myself to get closer to my goals each time. In fact, manifesting for your dream life might be good practice to help you with that as I have a guide on “10 Ways to Manifest Your Dream Life”.
You can also improve your luck towards those positive changes by expanding your network, showing up and accepting invitations that fit with your life goals or help you be positive, setting boundaries (knowing when to say “no” than “yes” to everything), and believing in yourself.
4. Inspire yourself day in and day out.
Forget and forgive the past. Be honest with yourself. You can gain the momentum to move forward in life if that is what you want. I find that inspiring myself day in and day out will help me make change easier to grasp. How do I do that?
I’ve learned from my church and Bible teachings that serving others is one major way to help you improve yourself towards positive change. I love to give back whether it’s helping out on a service project to give back to a community or whether I’m writing my useful guides and inspiring tips for anyone who comes across my blog posts. When you’re doing things for others too, you may just uplift your mood because giving is a charitable act that shows our own problems in life doesn’t have to be so difficult to overcome when we see how others live.
I highly suggest to make a bucket list so that you always know what things you really want to do in life and letting that list inspire you towards change. In addition, you could also make a vision board or do some journaling to envision your dreams.
Inspiring yourself in any way you feel is best will always give you the hope you’re looking for. Another thing I do to inspire myself is to find/read/watch about success stories of people who’s gotten to the position I want to one day get into. This is probably the most effective thing I’ve done. I am so easily happy for others’ success rather than being envious because I know if they can do it, what makes me think I can’t do it too? And remember, it’s okay to be your own cheerleader!
5. Embrace the discomfort.
You know you are truly going after change when you start to feel those feelings of discomfort. You need to get out of your comfort zone and that starts by saying “yes” to things you haven’t done before. Yes, it can be scary and so uncomfortable but you might not know how great you’ll actually feel after.
When you learn to let go of things, you attract abundance that needs room in your life. If you noticed too, creating change is about mindset. So go for it, tiger.
These are my 5 simple tips on how you can change your life because I’ve followed each one and I know I can say those have really helped me to get to the life changes I’ve prayed and dreamt about. Have you ever tried any of these ways too?